RANTS AND RAVES

2nd Birthing Story: Officially A Doting Mom of Two

Monday, September 07, 2015


This past week has been a blur. A huge surreal blur.

We had welcomed our 2nd son last Friday, and it has been a roller coaster of emotions for all of us. That day at 4am, I went into the labor room fully prepped for a normal delivery. We had been keeping an eye on the baby's weight so he wouldn't be too big since my OB had a hard time delivering our 1st because of his size relative to my birth canal. I had listened & faithfully followed all instructions, and the most recent ultrasound confirmed that everything was in order for the NSD we had wanted - no cord coil, weight & size appropriate for his age, and positioned perfectly against my cervix just in time for his grand entrance in a week or 2.

And then I ended up with an emergency c-section. Apparently, as soon as my water broke, we had a prolapsed cord - the umbilical cord came out ahead of the baby and his heart rate & oxygen was dropping fast. When I woke up in the recovery room, my OB had explained what happened & I still couldn't believe what I was hearing. I reached up to touch my abdomen, and there it was - the vertical incision running just below my belly button.

I looked around and didn't even see my baby. Again. Part of what I was avoiding this time around was having my minute-old child wheeled away instantly & I couldn't hold him because something went wrong. I was also looking at NSD because the healing process for me was so much more easier & I wanted to be able to care for my 2-year old the soonest, too. I wanted, but life had a different plan again. 

I cried non-stop because I wasn't allowed to get up yet, with a urinary catheter attached, IVs, and anesthesia still running through my system, so I couldn't see my baby. He was also not allowed to be roomed in until they were certain he could regulate his temperate on his own, so he had to stay in the immediate Care Unit indefinitely. I was stuck in bed wallowing in all this disappointment.

The following day, as soon as my doctor gave a go that I could try to stand, I walked to the NICU, taking it slow but refusing the wheel chair altogether as my OB suggested. When I saw all these babies inside incubators, with tubes & some with several other paraphernalia, the heartbreak was back again. Then we were taken to our Enzo & just like that I was awash with relief, happiness & sadness all at the same time that I was back to crying again.

Relieved that the most he needed was extra heat and hydration, and that he was otherwise healthy. Happy that we both survived & he was finally with us. Sad that I wasn't there to hold him the soonest he came out.

Kuya watching over as our their pedia does a final check before officially discharging baby bro
Joaquin came to visit us the day we were going to be discharged & we're all very happy he has been very sweet to his new brother since. The house is now all mess & chaos, and we're all trying to settle into a new rhythm because we will now be dealing with 2 very young kids (no nanny, no house help). I've had around 30 hours of sleep in total since last week that I zone out every now & then, but at the end of the day when I look around & watch my husband & kids sleeping soundly (for a few hours at least :P) all I am is really just grateful for all of it. And I have never been more in love.

welcome to the family, little one!

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